Confrontational memories
by GrimmKittyxIchiBerry
Summary: An argument between Ichigo and Grimmjow leaves Ichigo reminiscing about how they met. Rubbish summary sorry. AU , OOC, depression, swearing, Grimm/Ichi Oneshot


**Hi and thanks for reading. This is my second one shot, it took me a while to write and a couple of my friends helped me out with ideas but I finally finished it. I had started it just out of boredom and then couldn't stop writing until I had it all completed. There are only two major time changes so it should be easy to follow but I'm sorry if it confuses you although I doubt it will. It contains swearing and it has a bit of a depressed Ichi in but Grimm soon helps with that. I don't own bleach unfortunately. Well I hope you enjoy it and thanks again for reading**

**Confrontational memories **

**Present day**

Ichigo knew he had to say something, he had meant to confront Grimmjow about the letter as soon as he had saw it but instead he had been a coward and hidden the letter hoping that as long as it was gone Grimmjow would stay, but Ichigo knew better than that so as he climbed into their bed he finally gathered the courage to talk to him about it.

"You ever thought about what'll happen after?" Ichigo looked into confused blue eyes as he pulled the covers over their bodies.

"After? After what?" Grimmjow continued staring at his berry, he didn't mean… break up did he? Surely he didn't want to break up not after three years together, nothing big had happened recently had it? Grimmjow thought back over the past week, the only thing that put even a tiny bit of stress on them was the visit from ichigos crazy-ass dad but something had Ichigo acting weird, sort of distant this last week.

"After you leave," Grimmjow eyes widened in shocked horror, Ichigo really was breaking up with him. He watched Ichigo intensely, watching a flicker of sadness in his chocolate eyes before he looked away, not knowing what he could say. Grimmjow had always done whatever had made the smaller more comfortable and if Ichigo wanted to leave him then, as much as it tortured him to think about, that was what he would do.

"Ichigo what do you mean me leave? Are you breaking up with me?" Grimmjow face paled as Ichigo did nothing to deny it. Grimmjows heart stopped beating as Ichigo made eye contact with him again, tears gathered at the edge of his chocolate eyes threatening to fall. Grimmjow couldn't take it anymore he torn the covers away as he leapt out of the bed as if the sheets had attacked him.

"G-g-grimm? Look im sorr-" Ichigo stopped talking as he saw the flames in the blue haired man's eyes as he paced throughout their bedroom, he knew this wasn't going to be easy but he couldn't do what he knew Grimmjow would want to do.

"SORRY? Ichigo what the hell did I do? Don't say nothing I know there's something! You've been distracted for the last week; I was going to leave it but if its bothering you this much. Jesus ichi please just tell me why!" Ichigo sat on the bed stunned into silence.

"Grimmjow SHUT THE FUCK UP! YOU'RE THE ONE WHO'S LEAVING ME! AND Y-Y-YOU DON'T EVEN-"

"What the fuck Ichigo! Im not leaving you! You're the one telling me to leave! I haven't done anything!" Grimmjow could feel his temper become heated, how dare Ichigo blame him for this!

"Done nothing? DONE NOTHING? I SAW IT GRIMMJOW, I JUST CAN'T DO IT! YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENED BETWEEN ME AND SHIRO AND WHEN HE LEFT, I-I-I-IT… I…we… no I just can't Grimmjow it destroyed me last time I lost someone. I thought that you understood…that you knew how much pain it caused me. I thought you were different that you wouldn't leave BUT YOURE JUST LIKE HIM!" Ichigo screamed at Grimmjow before he wrapped himself in the bed sheet as he began to tremble.

"Ichigo, hey Ichigo listen to me, please just calm down. I don't understand what you're talking about, what has this got to do with Shiro?" Grimmjow winced at ichigos words they argued all the time but it wasn't vicious arguing. Never had Ichigo compared anyone to Shiro not in the three years they had been together. Grimmjow knew that no-one could hurt his lover as the albino had but to hear Ichigo suggest that he could be compared to Shiro drove thousands of sharp daggers into his heart.

"Grimm I saw it, the letter with your promotion, I know you've got to move back to Germany. I thought you would tell me but you didn't so I know you're just going to up and leave and you know what the worst thing is? I thought for once I had something that was mine that wouldn't hurt me b-b-but y-you… you're just like him." Ichigo poked his head out of the covers to watch as Grimmjows eyes, once clouded with confusion, shone with understanding.

"Ichigo, you stupid idiot! I'm not leaving, Kisuke offered me the promotion but I turned it down. He was persistent, thinking that I was staying here because something had happened that made me hate Germany. When I explained that I turned it down because I had a boyfriend here that I wasn't going to leave for anything he finally gave up." Ichigos red, swollen eyes narrowed at Grimmjow, it couldn't have all been a misunderstanding could it?

"But the letter… it was open, it said you were leaving next week," Ichigos voice had lost its edge when he spoke although he leaned away when Grimmjow approached the bed and sat down trying to coax Ichigo out of the covers.

"I read the letter and was going to throw it away when Kisuke called me back offering me a promotion in the department I am in now so I met up with him. I came back and you were home, I was going to tell you but your dad and sisters visited. When they left you seemed a bit worried and it totally skipped my mind while I tried to cheer you up. I tried to find the letter to throw it away when I couldn't find it and you said you hadn't seen it, I assumed I must have thrown it away and forgot."

Tears started flowing down ichigos face as he realised how stupid he had been, of course Grimmjow wouldn't leave him the blue haired man had promised that he wouldn't leave him alone or let anyone hurt him. They verbally attacked each other at every chance they had but Grimmjow had never done anything that had caused Ichigo pain, despite the fact Ichigo had been a total bitch towards him the first time they had met. Ichigo remembered the first time he had met Grimmjow, he had screamed, kicked and punched the person who had stopped his life spilling out onto the side walk.

**Three years ago**

Ichigo walked as far as he could, further than his family could find him, he didn't know where he was going nor did he need to know. He had run away from his home after his dad had saved him from his most recent attempt to end his existence. Ichigo had noticed the man that was following him a while back but wasn't bothered, he didn't care as long as he kept walking nothing else mattered in his mind, that was when he was grabbed from behind before a sharp pain shot up his side, he looked down in shock as the creep pulled a sharp object from his side, whether it was knife or not Ichigo didn't notice. A small voice at the back of his brain told him to fight back or run … or ANYTHING but the boy just didn't understand, why should he understand it? What was the point? He slid down the alley wall, smiling, as the guy stalked towards him again this time catching his hand when he plunged towards the dazed orange headed kid. The object didn't cut very deep annoying Ichigo; he hadn't put up a fight why was it taking this long just for the creep to finish him off! He was feeling woozy from the obvious blood loss as he looked up wondering what took his attacker so long when he saw a blur of blue hair throw the creepy guy into the wall rendering him unconscious. Ichigo sighed as his vision faded finally letting go of his conscious gladly following his attacker into a death like sleep.

Ichigo woke the next day in a bright white room he recognized immediately. _Back in hospital again, god I wish people would keep their heroic efforts to them-FUCKING-SELVES!_ Ichigo heaved a sigh as a cheerful nurse sauntered in smiling at him, he glared at her as she told him what had happened. He didn't really want to know how he got to the hospital, how it was silly of him to be out in the bad part of town at that time of night and he already knew they had called his dad for fuck sakes he could hear him being a retard as he ran through the corridors, big surprise there.

"Kurosaki? Are you listening? The doctor said you'll be good to leave in about a week and the wound should be healed enough by then that it shouldn't bother you that bad; we're just keeping you in here to make sure there won't be any more problems. Ok well then I'll go tell your father its ok for visitors he seems… enthusiastic." The nurse left with the same cheerfully fake smile that she had entered with, nodding to the man outside telling him it was ok for him to go in.

Isshin stepped into the room, his face becoming serious as his eyes landed on his son. He wished he knew what to do but ever since 'that incident' left, Ichigo had just been going from bad to worse to totally broken and it was destroying Isshin and ichigos twin sisters to see him like this ."Ichigo-

"Dad don't, just don't" ichigos glare was glazed with pain he knew what he was doing wasn't fair, not on his dad or his sisters and he tried his best to keep it together, but at times when he was reminded of things, he would just lose it. He would be pulled back into that pain and the only answer he could find was to run so he did, he ran away. No-one knew whether he would try to run away literally or if he would try to run away from the pain by ending it all. Twice before had his dad found him on the edge of his life and Ichigo knew it wasn't fair but he didn't have the control needed to stay sane.

"Look Ichigo I know it's difficult but you have to think about your future, you have to live your life and not let the pain that shir-" Isshin mentally cursed as he saw Ichigo wince and his eyes become dazed, Isshin knew he had lost Ichigo then, everyone had tried to drag him out of his shell whenever _his_ name was mentioned but all had failed including his sisters, who meant more to him than anybody… well before _he_ had shown up. Isshin sat there hoping that his son would come out of his shell before he had to leave; he had to be careful what he said the next time.

Grimmjow had no idea why he had come back to check on the orange haired brat he had saved, he would have said that it was just to pass the time, His freak of a boss had 'kindly' requested he take a holiday even though he didn't need one but his boss had told him that he was on the verge of becoming a workaholic. So what if he hadn't took a holiday during his three years working there? Surely that was better for the company but Nooo Kisuke had told him in no uncertain terms that he would be demoted should he not take the fully paid holiday as well as suggesting that he get laid. Grimmjow couldn't argue with the prospect of a holiday on full pay but when he had asked Kisuke how he knew he was single, when in fact he was confident that he could get just about anyone to lay down for him, he was only answer by the weird man's laugh as his fan covered his face and he walked away. So there he was, standing in the door way to the man's room wondering whether he should knock or just walk in. _Never knocked before why start now? _And with that he strolled into the room like he owned the place.

As he entered the room Isshins head turned towards the door, Yuzu and Karin were still at school and Ichigo hadn't been the most sociable creature this last year so the blue haired man couldn't be a friend.

"Excuse me who are you?" Isshin asked Grimmjow as the man walked towards the bed, curious as to why the boy hadn't even noticed him enter nor was showing any other sign of being alive other than the steady rise and fall of his chest.

"Is he ok? Oh yeah sorry the names Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez, im the one who found him and stopped him from being bled dry by the freak that jumped him. I'm guessing you're his pa?" Grimmjows eyes hadn't left Ichigos emotionless face throughout his introduction, there was something creepy about the vacant stare.

"Thank you for helping Ichigo, I can't tell you how thankful we are you were there," Grimmjow tore his eyes from the boys, Ichigo, stare as he accepted the mans outstretched hand "and yeah you were right I'm Isshin Kurosaki, Ichigos dad. I'm sorry you came at a bad time; sometimes Ichigo gets, um… well like that. We try everything but we can only wait for the phase to pass, you're welcome to come back another time though."

Grimmjow was intrigued, for one he hated being ignored and two that stare was making him feel somewhat… pissed off. So he did what he always did spoke without thinking, "Ichigo was it? You in there?" Grimmjow walked towards Ichigo getting more and more annoyed as the orange head continued to ignore him. When he got close enough to touch the seeming lifeless body wrapped in the hospital blanket, he waved his hand in front of his face and when that got no reaction other than ichigos father asking him to stop it and leave Grimmjows temper got the better of him. Grimmjow pulled his hand into a fist. Isshin realised, a bit too late, what the blue haired man was planning to do as he raised his fist to ichigos face.

"STOP IT DON'T YOU DARE HI-" Isshin raced forward as the blue haired man threw his fist into his sons face, suddenly stopping as Grimmjows fist was caught by another fist, Isshin let out a breath of relief as his sons eyes burned into the taller males face.

"WHAT THE FUCK MAN! YOU DON'T JUST HIT PEOPLE IN HOSPITAL!" Ichigos face was twisted in anger as he pushed Grimmjow away glaring at the stranger that now had a shit eating smirk on his face "who the fuck are you anyway?"

"The names Grimmjow and is that any way to treat the person who saved you from slowly dying in that alley, I mean come on I had better things to do than haul your ass to the hospital" this was a huge lie, Grimmjow knew he would have done nothing more than sit in front of his TV complaining about life but the orange headed brat didn't need to know that now did he "you could at least show some gratification" Grimmjow laughed as he saw Ichigo process the information he had been given._ Bring on the endless ass kissing and apologies in 3…2…1…_

Grimmjows smirk was wiped of his face as Ichigo stuck his middle finger up at him "FUCK YOU, I would have been fine if you had just left me alone you dickless wanker,"

_Dickless wanker? Is that even possible? HANG ON WHAT THE FUCK! _Grimmjows glared at the injured male before he retorted totally confused "How the hell would you have been fine! You would have been dead... And isn't it impossible to be a dickless wanker?"

"That was the point! It would have been fine if you had just kept your nose out of others shit!" Grimmjow was shocked, had this kid just yelled at him for saving his life? What the hell, the kid was barley out his teens and he had no problem with his life ending at the end of someone's knife, what had happened to this guy? Grimmjow threw a questioning glance to ichigos dad who had just stared in shock at the whole interaction.

It was the first time, since 'that incident', Ichigo had shown any emotion other than sorrow or put effort into anything other than finding his next escape, Isshin watched Grimmjow with great interest. No-one had been able to draw Ichigo out of his shell, not even Karin when she had punched him, his son had just sat there with a dazed expression as his cheek bruised a nasty purple. This stranger had not only drew him out but also kept him out his shell as well as getting Ichigo to have an extended conversation, Isshin didn't care that the focus of the conversation was yelling at each other just that there was a conversation.

Apparently the rest of the hospital DID care that the conversation was a bit louder than usual as a nurse entered the room warning them that ichigos visitors will be removed should the cause another disturbance. Isshin quietly apologized for the disturbance and promised they would be quieter.

"Well um …" Isshin stood there rubbing the back of his neck in embarrassment, only to look up in surprise as Grimmjow started chuckle with suppressed laughter as he watched Isshin face turn a shade of pink but what nearly gave Isshin a heart attack was the sound that had escaped from Ichigo, a small, pained snicker that was followed by a tiny smirk.

"Dad, Yuzu and Karin will be home soon, wouldn't it be best if you went back soon," Ichigo sent a small smile to his dad as he nodded his head towards the clock that hung above the door.

"Oh yeah I suppose I should get back, well Ichigo get some sleep and I'll come back tomorrow with your sisters ok?" Isshin hugged Ichigo as he whispered quietly in his ear causing a sad smile to spread across the orange haired boys face before he nodded and settled back into his covers, getting ready to go back to sleep even though it was only 3.30pm.

"Come on Grimmjow lets go," Grimmjow followed the older man out of the room, turning back once he was through the door way only to see a small tear run down ichigos cheek before being pulled away by Isshin as he closed the door.

"Look Grimmjow can I ask you a favour? I know it sounds weird but can you keep visiting Ichigo even if it's just while he's in here, please," Isshin stared with pleading eyes at Grimmjow, he didn't know why Ichigo was effected by the blue haired man but he did know he WAS effected by him and that might just help him right now.

"Yeah sure I don't have much else to do and he's fun to mess with… but if you don't mind I want to know what the hell happened to him because from the sounds of it he would have happily died in that alley" Grimmjow watched as the older man ran his hand through his hair.

"I can't say much, it's personal to Ichigo but he's… lost people, the first time he coped with it but the second really broke him. I've got to go, the girls will be home soon, but tomorrow feel free to visit Ichigo he seems to… react more to you than to us, im sure he'll be glad to see you" Isshin climbed in his car as Grimmjow thought through the information he had been given before he got in his own car and drove back to his house, trying to make sense out of what had happened over the last two days.

Grimmjow visited the orange head the next day and next and the next until the week ended and Ichigo was released. The two had got to know each other in the week that had passed, Grimmjow did most of the talking telling Ichigo about his job, his crazy boss and his demented friends while Ichigo talked more about his sisters , father (who Grimmjow learnt was actually just as crazy as his boss in fact they almost matched perfectly) and his hobbies. On the day Ichigo was released Isshin invited Grimmjow to their house for a meal which Grimmjow gladly accepted. The blue haired male had, in just under a week, gone from a complete stranger to practically part of the family especially after Ichigo twin sisters Yuzu and Karin had met him. Isshin was relieved to see Ichigo show so much emotion even though it was normally annoyance at Grimmjow but at least it was a start to ichigos enjoyed the blue haired bastards company even if he had bluntly told Grimmjow to fuck off and that he wasn't welcome when the other had accepted the invitation to which Grimmjow just smirked and whispered something inaudible to Ichigo causing him to turn as red as a strawberry, punch Grimmjow in the face and storm off towards his father's car.

Grimmjow had just laughed it off and after getting the address from Isshin, drove home while sorting through his thoughts about the orange head. At first visiting Ichigo had just been something to do to pass the free time he had due to the two week holiday he was forced to take but soon it had developed into something... more. Grimmjow had driven all the way home before he came to the conclusion that he actually had strong feelings for the weird orange haired kid but never in a million years would he admit to ichigos face. The thought of ichigos face if he told him that in just under a week he had developed feelings for the kid, brought a smirk to his face as he changed his clothes and drove to the kurosaki's house.

He waited patiently as he heard the doorbell resound through the house followed by Karin shouting at her brother to get the door.

"Thought I had finally got rid of ya and then ya stalk me home!" Ichigo smiled as he let Grimmjow in, Ichigos smile grew wider day by day, like it was a wound that was, slowly but surely, healing.

"Of course you can't get rid of me that easily, what sort of stalker would I be then?" Grimmjow joked as he was led down the hall way into the dining room where Karin and Isshin waved him in while Yuzu dished out dinner before sitting down next to her sister.

"Ichi-nii Karin got into the football team at school today she even beat all the boys there" Yuzu smiled at her sister as Karin blushed causing everyone at the table to laugh at her discomfort.

"Yeah, I beat them but I didn't beat all the boys there was this one guy who was lots better than me and he said he'll help me practice this Sunday actually. You can come if you want it's only a practice match in the park and we'll probably beat them into the ground but toshiro said he wants to see what I can do in a proper game." Karin smirked, Grimmjow knew that she was a brilliant player especially with that kick, he had had first had experience with. The second day Grimmjow had visited the orange head in hospital he had arrived before Isshin and the nurse had recognized him and invited him in, telling him he might as well wait in the room rather than the cold November air. He had only just entered the room when Ichigo had woken up and they quickly got into a heated argument. That's when Karin had walked in, she was obviously one of those violent protective sister types because as soon as she saw the blue haired man arguing with Ichigo she had landed an incredibly painful kick in between his legs, he had been careful not to piss off the girl again.

"Grimmjow? Do you not like the food?" Yuzu asked as she looked from the plate to Grimmjow, the food hadn't been touched.

"Oh no I was just thinking about when I met Karin," Ichigo burst into laughter as Karin's blush deepened. To his family his laughter was a source of relief, before _him _the orange haired kid was the life and soul of the party but after, no matter what they tried nothing caused the boys eyes to smile like they were now.

"You should have seen your face it was comical!" Ichigo just laughed even harder as Grimmjow slapped him on the head "your face lost all its colour you were as pale as sh-" Karin hissed as Ichigo suddenly stopped laughing, realising what he was going to say, causing Grimmjow to shoot him a worried glance. He knew something was wrong when the boy's family had fell into silence and he didn't like not knowing something.

"Hey berry you ok?" Grimmjow tapped him on the shoulder causing his head to snap up, Grimmjow saw something he couldn't name swim through his eyes before the smaller male shook his head and shot a small smile back at Grimmjow.

"Ne, yeah im fine just a bad memory nothing big and don't call me that! So ya coming to see Karin are game right?" Grimmjow raised an eyebrow at the change in ichigos voice almost like he was trying to hide behind his question.

"Yeah I'll go. I've still got the week off I might as well, as long as its ok with your family of course" Grimmjow looked around waiting for the others to speak but was faced with the three shocked, speechless faces "um is that not ok?"

"Uh what? Um yeah sure the more the merrier right?" Isshin stumbled over his words as the shock of ichigos reaction sunk in, normally should someone else had mention that name Ichigo would have retreated into his isolation but when Ichigo thought of _him_ the situation became somewhat worse, he wouldn't speak for days and you knew that he was trying his best not to think of anything. So what had happened to Ichigo just then, he had not only thought of _him_ but also spoke his name and Ichigo had just called it a 'bad memory'!

"Great so who are you playing against?" Ichigo carried on the conversation but listened more than spoke leaving Grimmjow confused and annoyed at the fact that he wasn't sure what had caused the change to the mood at the table.

"Yuzu would you like some help with that?" they had finished their dinner and were sat in front of the TV watching a football match. Yuzu shook her head at her brother's offer as she picked up the pile of dishes.

"Um… Grimmjow will you just bring that cup through please?" Ichigo frowned at Yuzus request, Grimmjow was a guest and he had just offered to help, why was his sister being rude?

"I said I'll hel-

"Sit down kurosaki you just got outta hospital, relax it's only a cup. Not gunna kill me." Ichigo glared at him as Grimmjow grabbed the cup and followed Yuzu into the kitchen.

"Thanks Grimmjow… stay here for a minute please I want to talk to you," Grimmjow was shocked at the seriousness in the little girls voice, out of them all she was the most mature but cheerful one "look dad didn't want to tell you but you've got closer to Ichigo in the last week or so than we've been in just under a year so you need to know."

"Is this something to do with the people he's lost?" Yuzu had his attention as soon as he realised she was serious.

"Yeah to start with we lost our mother, masaki, it happened when Ichigo was eight. Ichigo had been going to meet his friend Renji when a car had sped down the street, mother had pushed Ichigo out the way of the speeding car but mother wasn't as… lucky. She died on the way to hospital and Ichigo blamed himself. He was terrible for a while but then he met Shiro. Shiro was the albino that transferred to Ichigos School four months after mother's accident and the two had become inseparable in a small amount of time. Ichigo would always be with Shiro and at the beginning of his high school Shiro asked Ichigo out, we already knew about ichigos preferences and were glad he had finally found someone that loved him, at least we thought" Grimmjow cringed at the venom in the young girls voice "Ichigo was so happy with him, anywhere they went both of them were the life and soul of the party. Shiro helped Ichigo to forgive himself about mother even though he wasn't at fault anyway, but the relationship ended brutally"

Grimmjow was getting disturbed by how pissed off the young girl looked and worried by what she meant when she said 'brutally' but he waited patiently for Yuzu to regain her composure.

"Shiro left-

"No that bastard didn't leave, he ran!" Grimmjow jumped as Karin entered the kitchen, her gaze deadly as she continued "He packed his bags while Ichigo was at college, he had just finished school and entered college, and anyway he packed his bags and left without even leaving a note or talking to Ichigo. He left before Ichigo got home and then, after three hours of Ichigo panicking and searching with dad, Shiro sends Ichi a single fucking text message saying nothing more than, moving to America I'm sorry king don't try to find me. Turns out the guy had got a girl pregnant, he was seeing her at the same time as Ichigo for the last 18 months they were together. It destroyed Ichi-nii, for the first month he tried to ring Shiro at least three times a day but never got in touch with him, he was so distraught he couldn't focus on collage. After three months he tried to overdose and was put in hospital for a week, he got a bit better but then he tried again this time with his wrists. Dad got him a year break from college for mental instability"

Grimmjow was silent he had no idea that Ichigo had gone through something that … destructive but what shocked him even more was the fact that Karin was nearly crying while Yuzu was radiating so much fury that Grimmjow felt like he was being burnt by her eyes.

"We tried everything to get Ichigo back on his feet but nothing we did help. He was like an empty shell, he barely talked or ate or went out but then you come along and just like that he's able to not only smile but laugh and he's willing to go to Karin's games. Not only that but he's able to nearly say HIS name and instead of retreating into his shell like he normally would he brushes it off as a BAD MEMORY! So im telling you now Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez I don't care what the fuck you did before you met Ichigo, I don't care if you have a criminal record or you want out of this crazy family, you are the only person that has been able to help him so im begging you please don't hurt him!"

Both Grimmjow and Karin were stunned neither had heard Yuzu so mad to raise her voice let alone curse. "Yuzu… I won't hurt him. I don't know what it's like to be hurt like that, I've never been in a situation like that but I promise I won't hurt him. I know I've only just got to know him but he is special to me…" Grimmjow had no idea how to finish that sentence, yes Ichigo was special to him, hell he even got ridiculously angry at the thought of that dickhead hurting him like that, but he really had never been in a relationship. Grimmjow had always hated girls the way they would bounce around him, flaunting the death traps they called tits, so a relationship with a girl had been out of the question even if they were all more than willing to lay down for him. He had a few friends with benefits but both sides knew that nothing was going to happen other than sex when they met up and that was how he liked it, no strings attached.

"That's fine im not asking you to jump into a relationship with him, just that you don't lead him on. The thing he needs the most is someone close to him be that a friend or a lover," Yuzu smiled sweetly taking Grimmjow by surprise as she walked back to the living room.

"How'd she know I was gay anyway?" Grimmjow frowned as Karin collapsed in a fit of giggles before she started to follow her sister back into the living room

"Gaydar! My sister is very perceptive," Grimmjow trailed after Karin as he let out a bark of laughter, when they got the living room they were shushed by Yuzu who pointed to a sleeping Ichigo curled up on the sofa, his face relaxed as he breathed softly.

"Grimmjow could you help me and carry him upstairs, I would wake him but he hasn't slept so well in a while so I would rather not," Isshin smiled at the blue haired male as Grimmjow carefully lifted the smaller male, Ichigo instantly snuggled closer into Grimmjows chest. Grimmjow slowly followed ichigos dad up the stairs into the orange haired man's room; he patiently uncurled ichigos hand from his top as he laid the sleeping man on the bed.

"I guess Yuzu told you about what happened,"

"Yeah she told me… um if you don't mind me asking but why do you trust me so much. It's just that it's a bit weird that you trust me enough to tell me his past even though you've only known me for a week," Grimmjow avoided the older man's eyes when he answered

"When you first came into the hospital room Ichigo had retreated into his own world, I had accidently nearly mentioned Shiro; we have tried everything to get Ichigo back to earth when that happened before… Karin had even punched him out of frustration and he did nothing, he just sat there as his cheek bruised. That time you punched him, he reacted immediately, not only did he block you but he yelled at you and for the first time in god knows how long Ichigo kept up a conversation willingly. You affected Ichigo unlike anyone else in the last year so I asked you to visit him again and you agreed not just to be polite but because you were worried. I first thought it when you looked so… confused by what Ichigo said, then you asked me what had happened to him and you seemed like you actually cared." Grimmjow glanced towards Ichigo as he shifted in his sleep mumbling something inaudible before settling again "I was interested in what type of person you were so I did a background check on you,"

"What? You did what?" Grimmjow stared at Isshin, he knew the man was a bit weird but he had just told Grimmjow he had done a background check on him in a tone that suggested that he did such things regularly

" Sorry I know privacy and all that but I had to check you weren't some weird paedophile or something didn't I," Isshin smiled sheepishly as Grimmjows mouth hung open, he'd been called a lot of things but it was the first time he'd been called a paedophile, now had someone had called his boss a paedophile he would have understood.

"Are you serious? Out of all the things that you could think I was the first thing you thought was paedophile! Do I really look like a paedophile?"

"Grimmjow don't listen to him he's a paranoid freak, you don't look like a paedophile. Anyway can you have this discussion somewhere else you're going to wake ichi-nii," Karin glared at her father as she ushered them out the room before closing the door to her brothers room.

" Look I apologize if me running a check on you offended you but it happened already so get over it, anyway the whole point of this is that im warning you not to hurt Ichigo, do anything you want but as soon as your actions hurt Ichigo you will wish you were dead do yo- OW!" Karin growled as she hit her idiot of a dad, how were they going to get Grimmjow to help Ichigo if their freak of a dad scared him off first.

"DAD seriously we already talked to him and he said he wouldn't hurt ichi-nii you didn't have to scare him! Look at him; he looks like he's ready to crap himself!" Grimmjow scowled at ichigos sister as she shoved Isshin towards the stairs, when had he turned into such a weakling that he was intimidated by a girl less than half his age and a borderline retard? God what had just a week with the orange headed kid and his family done to him!

"Well I need to get goin-

"You are coming to my match right? It's this Sunday like I said, at Hollow Park. Ya know where that is? In fact here's ichigos phone number text him if you can't find it!" Karin shoved a small piece of paper into Grimmjows hand before practically pushing the blue haired man out the door before Yuzu scolded her for being rude and apologized for her sister and fathers actions.

Grimmjow had drove all the way home before he realised that he hadn't got a time of Karin for the game, he pulled his phone out and saved ichigos number into his phone before he forgot. He text him the next day not wanting to wake the orange head.

_-Hey its Grimmjow wot times Karin's match?_

_-12.30, how'd ya get this number?_

_-Karin gave it 2 me hope u don't mind :)_

_-No its fine sorry for falling to sleep and not saying bye_

_- Its ok, u were so cute snuggling up to me and begging me not to go :P_

_-I SO DIDN'T DO THAT! _

_-PMSL calm down I was joking_

_-T_T you're an arsehole_

_-aww poor Ichiberry can't take a joke _

_-whatever Grimmkitty_

_-Grimmkitty? Wtf where do you get that from?_

_-well you act like a cat… it's hard to explain_

_- A cat? Seriously I don't act like a cat_

_-you so do it's the way you move it's like a feline would, no offense_

_-shut up at least I don't blush like a strawberry_

_-I do not blush thank you very much_

_-poor little strawberry is getting defensive_

_-I was not, anyway gotta go c u tomorrow _:)

_-yeah c u later _

The next day Grimmjow met up with Ichigo, after getting lost on the way to the park. Karin's team beat the opposition 5-1, 3 of the goals were scored by Toshiro the other 2 by Karin, who blushed every time the white haired boy congratulated her. Ichigo didn't fail to notice his sisters red face and continuously teased her about it until she had challenged him to a small match. Karin had perfect aim when she focused so her family knew that when the ball hit Ichigo in the groin it was no mistake on Karin's side, Grimmjow swore never to play any sort of sport with the black haired devil, he cared too much about his precious jewels.

Isshin was ecstatic that his son was finally interacting with his family again but there was something wrong with Ichigo. Even though his son was laughing and smiling there were barriers the boy had placed around himself and Isshin wasn't the only one to notice them. Grimmjow could tell there was something troubling the smaller man but didn't know how to ask, every time he got close to asking Ichigo seemed to notice and direct the conversation elsewhere or totally end it. He continued trying but by the end of the day Grimmjow still hadn't got anything out of the man and before he could try anymore the kurosaki's decided to go home, leaving Grimmjow suspicious and anxious as he made his way home.

"Grimmjow? Hello? Yeah it's Isshin, where are you?" Grimmjow frowned at the panic in the older man's voice when he had answered the phone.

"I'm at home… in bed like a normal person would be at what, 2.35 in the morning, seriously what's wrong Isshin?" Grimmjow sprung out of his bed as Isshin continued speaking, putting the phone on loudspeaker as he pulled on some clothes "What do you mean gone! How can he be gone!"

"It's exactly a year since Shiro ran but I thought he was ok! You saw him today he was laughing he even joined Karin for a kick about. He was fine when he went to sleep but I woke up a bit ago and Ichigo was gone, I've searched everywhere but I can only go so far, I don't want Yuzu and Karin to wake up they'll panic." Isshin was restless, his voice drowned in worry and panic. "Look there's only one more place I can think of and that's Shiros old house but it's too far for me to get to."

"I'll go just tell me where it is… ok ill ring you if I find him, don't worry he'll be fine" Grimmjow ended the call as he locked his house and jumped into his car. He drove straight to the address Isshin had given him, furious that someone from a year ago could still hurt his strawberry. His anger sat boiling in the pit of his stomach until he reached the house and saw Ichigo leaning against the fence that separated the garden from the sidewalk. He climbed out of his car, approaching the broken man slowly, giving him a chance to notice the taller man.

"Ichigo, why do you do this to yourself," Grimmjow sighed as he moved toward Ichigo who raised his head at the sound of Grimmjows voice.

Ichigos face was branded onto Grimmjow mind, through his eyes he saw the boys mental dam break, all the fury, pain and sorrow flooded onto the distraught face, every emotion the orange haired kid had locked up and banished tore through his barriers. For the first time since Shiro had left him Ichigo crumpled to the ground and screamed, tears streamed down his face as Grimmjow wrapped his arms around him gently tugging him towards his car.

"Ichigo shhh its ok im here, I won't let anyone hurt you ever again. I'll never leave you until you send me away, I'll make sure you're never left alone" Ichigo hid his face against Grimmjows chest as Grimmjow helped him towards the car. The last of the smaller man's energy deserted him and he slumped into the car seat as Grimmjow slowly and carefully strapped him in before closing the car door and climbing into his own seat.

"hey Isshin I found him… yeah its ok … but im going to take him to mine he's shattered in more than one way and im sure you and the girls will want some sleep, I'll bring him home when he wakes up … yeah its fine don't worry about it." Grimmjow put his seat belt on as he ended the call. He drove as Ichigo cried until he couldn't even keep his eyes open due to the energy he had spent, he was no longer able to hear the comforting words Grimmjow whispered.

"Hey king how ya been?"

Ichigo spun around in horror, there was only one person who called him 'king'. It couldn't be! He had left, he wasn't coming back "S-s-Shiro? You- no-y-y-you cant. It's not-you're not-"

"Shhh king, stop talkin I'll always be here,"

"No you can't be here! Don't you know what you did! GO AWAYY!" Ichigo was torn between anger and heartbreak as white arms wrapped around him, arms that had once gave Ichigo comfort now caused the orange headed boy to feel unclean, violated "GET AWAY FROM ME!"

"But king surely this is what you want? Me back with you. Isn't this the very thing you've been wishing for this last year, for me to take you back? Even after you pushed me away with the way you suffocated me, drowned me in your pathetic excuse of a relationship." A snake like tongue whispered the same words that had haunted ichigos mind even since he had lost Shiro.

"NO, no Shiro I didn't… I tried, it wasn't my fault, and I loved you. I PROMISE YOU I LOVED YOU! P-p-please believe me… I did but you … you still left…" Ichigo collapsed into the stone cold arms of his ex-lover, eyes glazed with torment and tears.

"You loved me Ichigo? After everything you did to me? You followed me like a lost puppy; you were just a thorn in my side, a waste of time. A misssstake." The words that were hissed into ichigos ears stabbed at his heart, slowly embedding themselves into the fragile organ.

"Shiro please no more, I can't, don't it hurts… please im sorr…" ichigos voice was drowned out by a dangerous growl, he turned his head to meet the deep blue eyes of the pure white panther that stalked towards him.

Ichigo watched in awe as the panther leapt towards them, swiping its claws at Shiro causing the albino man to leap backwards. The smaller male felt no fear when the panther wrapped its silky tail round his waist, pulling him towards its snow like body.

The panther wrapped its body around the orange haired man, its fur warm and inviting, as the white man regained his footing and approached the panther hissing at the pair. "Get away from MY king," Ichigo cringed at the bite in the other males voice, even when they disagreed Shiro had never used such a disturbing tone, he backed up further against the panther he needed to get away from his white haired ex.

The panther opened its mouth showing off deadly white fangs, words flowed from its mouth they sounded like a growl at first but soon transformed into soothing words "I won't let anyone hurt you ever again. I'll never leave you until you send me away; I'll make sure you're never left alone."

"Grimmjow im scared, it doesn't feel like Shiro, please make it go away," Tears ran down ichigos cheeks as the panther licked his face causing relief to wash over him, that was until he noticed how close the albino had advanced.

"Ichigo its ok im here im not going anywhere," Grimmjows soothing voice eased his fear as the albino stopped in front of them, hissing as a flash of something close to hurt swam through the golden eyes before anger and understanding settled in.

"So he's my substitute, a total stranger that you've only known for what? A week. Do you truly think some sad excuse of a human can take my place? He'll leave you maybe… not today or the next but eventually you'll break everything you have with him and he won't be able to take it anymore." The cold heartless words clawed at Ichigo, the boy wanted to run but couldn't, it just felt so natural to be curled in the fur of the panther.

"Ichigo calm down, you need to calm down, nobody's going to hurt you," Grimmjows words floated across ichigos thoughts burning away the icy words that had splintered themselves into ichigos mind and Ichigo felt, for the first time since Shiro had left, genuinely carefree and happy.

"He isn't your substitute and he isn't a stranger in fact I feel like I know Grimmjow more than I even knew you. No he won't take your place because you no longer have a place; he was the one to show me that. Maybe we will leave each other in the future either because of him or me but I can tell you now HE WILL NEVER HURT ME LIKE YOU DID!" Ichigo gasped as he finished his rant, the panther growled as the albino pulled Ichigo away from its fur.

Shiros skin was warm and brighter as his arms once again wrapped around Ichigo closing him in a warm and comfortable hug "That's right no one will hurt us like he did ever again," ichigos eyes snapped up to meet warm chocolate ones identical to his own. He stepped out of the arms that encircled him to come face to face with a smiling copy of himself, the same orange hair, chocolate eyes, nose, mouth, clothes "you've finally let him go, don't lose your chance with grimm he's good for us, in more way than one." His doppelganger smiled as he walked towards the panther and ran his hand through the snowy fur before smiling back at Ichigo.

"Ichigo! Seriously get up or im kicking your arse out!"

"Huh what? Go away I was speaking," Ichigo groaned at the bright sun that beamed onto his face as he opened his eyes "seriously what the hell!"

"Glad you're awake, but seriously you nearly gave me a heart attack with the way you acted last night. I know it must be hard but can you at least give me a heads up so I can get ready for a call from your lunatic of a dad at stupid o'clock in the morning because his crazy freak of a son decided to go on an early morning trip to depression Ville!" Ichigo winced at Grimmjows tone, feeling guilty because he knew it was his fault that the older man was worried.

"I'm sorry… it won't happen again." Ichigo hung his head as he heard Grimmjow sigh, he didn't want to see the eyes that held the same hint of disappointment that his father's held when he had woke up in the hospital after his first attempt. The words of his clone flickered through his mind and for the second time in his life he prepared himself for rejection.

"Look Ichigo-

"Grimmjow go out with me?"

"-I know that it wa- Wait WHAT?" Grimmjow stared in shock at Ichigo as the orange haired males face burnt bright red as he avoided Grimmjows startled blue eyes, the same blue as the panther from his dream "Ichigo sorry I think I misheard you. Can you repeat that please?"

"Um I asked ifyouwouldgooutwithme… please" Ichigo smothered his head into Grimmjows pillow as a shit-eating smile covered Grimmjows face.

"Ne Ichigo I didn't quite catch that," Grimmjow laughed as Ichigo threw the pillow at his head before he pulled the smaller male into his arms "im sorry it's just so easy to tease you"

"Grimm im being serious!" Ichigo pouted as Grimmjow just continued smiling at him.

"I know, you wouldn't joke about something like this so my question is: What made you ask me?" Grimmjow frowned as Ichigo moved from his arms to sit back on the bed as his eyes flickered with uncertainty.

"Ok so you might not believe me or think im crazy… in fact I probably am crazy but oh well…" Ichigo continued to describe every aspect of his dream, when he had finished he didn't dare meet Grimmjows eyes. Was he thinking that he really was crazy, god he hoped not… he wasn't crazy was he?

"Um, Ichigo you still there?"

"No! I died and went to hell had sex with the devil but then he got too clingy so I had to break up with him, he got all bitchy then so I went to god and he brought me back to life. And now here I am, talking to you! Of course im still here, still here going crazy thinking about whether I am actually crazy. FUCKIN HELL!" they both sat in silences as ichigos words sank into their minds before they burst into fits of laughter.

"Heh sorry but that devil isn't going to leave you alone even if you are alive," Grimmjow grinned as he lifted ichigos face and gently pressed his lips against ichigos, pulling back as blood rushed to the smaller males head and his face lite up bright red " you know you're cute when you blush,"

"Y-you …wha?" Grimmjows laughter filled the room as Ichigo attempted to communicate but his brainwaves had been totally blown by the contact with Grimmjow "I-I-is that a yes?"

"That's a yes ichi, I'll stay with you for as long as you want me to." Grimmjow attacked ichigos lips more impatiently, nipping at his lip asking for permission before invading ichigos mouth as he let his lips part. The two tongues fought for control before Ichigo submitted, his thoughts washed away by the pleasure Grimmjow provided. Ichigo reveled in the feeling of familiarity he hadn't been able to find since Shiro had left, Grimmjow being there had always felt so … right. Ichigo realized he had always felt that way about the man from the first time he had saw that obnoxious blue hair, it was the very feeling that had kept the repetitive nightmares away when he had been in hospital, the feeling that had allowed him to smile, laugh, finally be able to communicate with his family. He no longer felt haunted by his ex's voice, by Shiros pale complexion in memories of a time when he had been healed but hadn't felt complete.

"G-grimm…ah… hah, I need ta-

"I told ya dad that I would bring you back today but I can ring him if you don't want to go back," Grimmjows voice was playful but held a little tone of seriousness, Grimmjow didn't want to let the slightly flushed man go but he knew that Ichigo would want to see his family after such a stressful night and … eventful morning.

"No he'll be worried, I've got to go back home… come with me?" Ichigo rested his head against Grimmjows chest, waiting for his breath to even out as he waited for Grimmjows answer.

"Yeah of course if you want me there, I said didn't I? That I wouldn't leave until you told me to go," Ichigo cuddled into Grimmjow as he sighed in relief. He hadn't been sure how the taller man would react to his confession, he wasn't even sure that grimm would take him seriously, after all he hadn't put in much effort to get to know the blue haired man it always seemed like Grimmjow was the one who made all the moves and Ichigo had just followed his pace.

"Hang on, you know who Shiro is?" although Ichigo had gotten over Shiro the sound of his name rolling off his tongue was unnatural and cold.

"Yeah your sister told me about him the day I came round for a meal after you got out of hospital, I never thought Yuzu could be so scary. I can tell you now that was the first time I had been terrified by someone's little sister,"

"Yuzu? Yuzu scares you! Grimm how are you scared of Yuzu, she's the friendliest person I know!"

"You didn't hear her when she was yelling at me, even Karin was shocked. Anyway instead of rubbing in the fact that, yes your little sisters scare the shit out of me, I think you should ring your dad before he has a panic attack." Grimmjow threw Ichigo his mobile phone, doubting that the boy had been in the right frame of mind to have taken his phone with him when he had left his house. "Ring ya dad and I'll go make us breakfast. There are some clothes that should fit you in the wardrobe on the left; your clothes are in the wash. Just chuck the pajamas in that basket when ya done"

Ichigo was surprised at the fact he hadn't even noticed he wasn't wearing his own clothes but didn't think much on it, he was pretty sure it was ok to forget the little things when you were on the verge of a mental break down… or under the stress of noticing how much of a sex god Grimmjow truly was for the first time. His face flushed as he realized just what he had thought, he tried distracting himself by calling his dad.

"Hi dad… yeah im fine, im at Grimm's he's just cooking breakfast."

"That's good when will you be home? I'll tell your sisters you slept over there"

" We'll have breakfast and then come home... and dad you like grimm don't you?" Ichigo paused; he wasn't sure how to tell his dad about Grimmjow, they had only known each other for a week and a bit after all.

"Yeah he has been good for you"

"But we have only known him for a week! That isn't long enough for us to get to know him" Ichigo had no idea why he was trying to make an argument against what his dad had said.

"… Ichigo it didn't take long to see that Grimmjow was probably the only person who could help you"

"What do you mean? You're making it sound like he's already helped," Ichigo was panicking; he couldn't tell that he'd kissed Grimmjow could he? Was he that easily read?

"Ichigo it doesn't take a rocket scientist to see that you really like him and he likes you, really Ichigo we aren't blind, it wouldn't surprise me if he asked you out one of these days!"

"DAD SHUT UP!" Ichigo knew as soon as the man on the other side grew silent that he had made a mistake.

"No way, he asked! Whoa that was fast, sooo what did you say? You should go out with him like I said he's good for you!"

"Um it was the other way round…"

"REALLY! That's brilliant. LISTEN YUZU YOUR BROTHER GOT A BOYFRIEND! MASAKI WILL BE SO HAPPY. SOON WE WILL HAVE LITTLE BABIES AND ILL BE A GRANDP-

Ichigo cut the call after Karin screamed at their father to stop yelling and Isshins yelling abruptly stopped as Karin hit the crazy old man. Ichigo placed the phone on the bedside table before changing his clothes and making the bed. He grabbed the phone and left the room, following his nose to find Grimmjow cooking in the kitchen.

"Hey I was just about to shout ya, yours is on the table, its only bacon and egg but better than nothing right,"

"Thanks I rang dad told him that we would be home after breakfast… he knows about us," Ichigo watched for Grimmjows reaction as he began eating his breakfast, waiting for his words to sink into the blue haired man.

"Knows? How does he know about 'us' when we only just started an 'us'?"

"He said something and I reacted the wrong way sorry" Ichigo sighed as he remembered his reaction, if he had thought before he had spoken they wouldn't be in this situation "He thought you asked, was surprised when I said it was me,"

"Heh at least we don't have the issue of telling him now and your dad likes me right? So there's no problem and if there is we'll face it when it comes, don't worry it'll be fine" Grimmjow placed his plate on the table, opposite Ichigo and made small talk as they finished their breakfast and got ready to go to ichigos.

"You ready? My dad can be a bit psychotic when he's happy, so be warned" Ichigo smirked as they pulled up in front of the house and he stepped out the car as Grimmjow caught up with him.

"At least he's happy right? Trust me I think I can deal with anything as long as he doesn't go all overprotective on me again" Grimmjow snaked his arm around ichigos waist before pulling him into a deep passionate kiss leaving the orange head panting.

"MY DEAR SON-IN-LAW HAS BROUGHT THE BLUSHING BRIDE HOME FINALLY!" Grimmjows face dropped; maybe he wasn't ready for this after all.

**Present time**

"Ichigo are you ok? Look im sorry I didn't talk to you about the promotion but I didn't think it was important, I rejected it anyway. I promised you that I wouldn't ever leave you alone. I don't plan to leave unless you tell me to and give me an understandable excuse ok?" Ichigo was pulled out of his memories as Grimmjow wrapped him in his warm familiar arms. He sat there, as Grimmjow ran a soothing hand through his hair while he regained his composure

"I'm sorry; I got scared and jumped to conclusions. I really thought you were going to leave me" Ichigo snuggled closer to Grimmjow as he felt the other relax.

"I'm never leaving until you send me away, and I won't ever stop loving you even when you do. I'll become a stalker and follow you everywhere like" Ichigo giggled as he wiped the tears from his eyes before lifting his head and placing a small kiss on Grimmjows lips.

"Stalk me forever ok Grimmkitty?"

"Forever and ever Ichiberry, now go to sleep." Grimmjow pulled Ichigo under the covers before turning the light off.

"I love you Grimm," Ichigo mumbled sleepily into Grimmjows chest as he fell asleep to the sound of the taller man's heartbeat.

"I love you to Ichi," Grimmjow smiled and followed Ichigo into a deep relaxed sleep.


End file.
